I’m Not Perfect Anymore
I had a perfectly functional body and an intact self image before I broke my arm. Both cracked when I fell. For 60 plus years when I got a bruise or a blemish, I would just wait a few days or a few weeks and it would disappear; I would be perfect again. Sometimes I would get overweight, but my body would always return to my “perfect weight”. If I got a sore throat, bloodshot eyes or a runny nose, my body would heal itself and I would soon be good as before.
But March 13, 2011 changed everything. I was out taking a warm-up walk before my 9am exercise class and I fell on my face. I didn’t trip, I didn’t stumble. One second I was upright; next second I was flat on the ground face down. No warning. No sensors going off in my body to alert me I was nearing the edge of the sidewalk. I stepped off the curb into thin air and went down.
An X-Ray at the ER determined that I broke my humorous bone. I was two months in a sling, while the bone healed and two more months doing physical therapy and bodywork to regain my range of motion. But the arm may never regain the full range it had before I fell.
My first reaction to this notion was shock. “What, my arm may never be perfect again?” Then a memory floats up of my mom. She was in the kitchen chopping vegetables for dinner. The knife slipped. Her little finger dangled off her hand. She bandaged it, prayed and continued her life. The body healed itself but the finger was never the same. It grew back crooked. When my eyes landed on her crooked finger, I thought, “One little careless gesture, a slip of a knife and your body is marred forever.” She lived with that imperfection for 30 years.
Now I have an imperfection to live with—one fully functional arm and one slightly restricted one. The strength in my hand will return over time but the full range of motion may not. And that is just what is. I have to wrap my mind around a new self image, one that isn’t perfect anymore.
Indeed, we take our body parts for granted - arms, legs, toes, fingers, knees, hips, neck. We give them no thought and they work perfectly fine until they don’t. Sooner or later our body parts begin to lose function – the neck doesn’t turn as far as it used to, the knees begin to ache, the toes grow bulges that rub against our shoes and make our feet hurt. American advertising suggests we can fix any body part with plastic surgery. Some become obsessed with the idea of physical perfection.
Ah-h-h, I have decided there are more important things in life to focus my attention on. We are given one body per lifetime. Our appreciation of that gift is seldom realized until some part of that gift is taken away. Why wait a moment longer. Take a deep breath and acknowledge the wonder of life that animates those muscles and bones. My physical body may not be perfect anymore but the life that pulses through it is one of the many wonders of the world. Life is what’s important, not body parts. Do what you can with what you’ve got and you’ll die with a smile on your face.
My broken bone has healed. My arm is 96% functional. I no longer take my body parts for granted. Every day I am grateful for a physical body that works extraordinarily well even though it may never be perfect again.
Until you return, fill your days with GIGGLES, JOY, and APPRECIATION!
Sylvia Silk, D.D. Director of the Institute For Balanced Living, Los Angeles,CA, USA
DoctorofDivinity, SpiritualCoach, ReconnectiveHealingPractitioner, Writer
But March 13, 2011 changed everything. I was out taking a warm-up walk before my 9am exercise class and I fell on my face. I didn’t trip, I didn’t stumble. One second I was upright; next second I was flat on the ground face down. No warning. No sensors going off in my body to alert me I was nearing the edge of the sidewalk. I stepped off the curb into thin air and went down.
An X-Ray at the ER determined that I broke my humorous bone. I was two months in a sling, while the bone healed and two more months doing physical therapy and bodywork to regain my range of motion. But the arm may never regain the full range it had before I fell.
My first reaction to this notion was shock. “What, my arm may never be perfect again?” Then a memory floats up of my mom. She was in the kitchen chopping vegetables for dinner. The knife slipped. Her little finger dangled off her hand. She bandaged it, prayed and continued her life. The body healed itself but the finger was never the same. It grew back crooked. When my eyes landed on her crooked finger, I thought, “One little careless gesture, a slip of a knife and your body is marred forever.” She lived with that imperfection for 30 years.
Now I have an imperfection to live with—one fully functional arm and one slightly restricted one. The strength in my hand will return over time but the full range of motion may not. And that is just what is. I have to wrap my mind around a new self image, one that isn’t perfect anymore.
Indeed, we take our body parts for granted - arms, legs, toes, fingers, knees, hips, neck. We give them no thought and they work perfectly fine until they don’t. Sooner or later our body parts begin to lose function – the neck doesn’t turn as far as it used to, the knees begin to ache, the toes grow bulges that rub against our shoes and make our feet hurt. American advertising suggests we can fix any body part with plastic surgery. Some become obsessed with the idea of physical perfection.
Ah-h-h, I have decided there are more important things in life to focus my attention on. We are given one body per lifetime. Our appreciation of that gift is seldom realized until some part of that gift is taken away. Why wait a moment longer. Take a deep breath and acknowledge the wonder of life that animates those muscles and bones. My physical body may not be perfect anymore but the life that pulses through it is one of the many wonders of the world. Life is what’s important, not body parts. Do what you can with what you’ve got and you’ll die with a smile on your face.
My broken bone has healed. My arm is 96% functional. I no longer take my body parts for granted. Every day I am grateful for a physical body that works extraordinarily well even though it may never be perfect again.
Until you return, fill your days with GIGGLES, JOY, and APPRECIATION!
Sylvia Silk, D.D. Director of the Institute For Balanced Living, Los Angeles,CA, USA
DoctorofDivinity, SpiritualCoach, ReconnectiveHealingPractitioner, Writer
Welcome back Sylvia. I always enjoy your writing, and have missed hearing from you. I know just what you mean about bodies and appreciation. Glad you're writing again.
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Thanks so much for your comment, Gayle. I love hearing from you. If the writing that continues daily in my head could be posted to my blog by telepathy, articles would appear every day. But alas, I am confined to pen and paper or computer keyboard to write and then post. I love writing and sharing my ideas with those of you who resonate with me. I'll keep sharing as long as there is an audience that appreciates it.
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