How to Handle a Speeding Ticket
An older woman gets pulled over for speeding. "Is there a problem, Officer?"
Officer: "Ma'am, you were speeding."
Older Woman: "Oh, I see."
Officer: "Can I see your license please?"
Older Woman: "I'd give it to you, but I don't have one."
Officer: "Don't have one?"
Older Woman: "Lost it 4 years ago for drunk driving."
Officer: "I see. Can I see your vehicle registration papers, please?"
Older Woman: "I can't do that."
Officer: "Why not?"
Older Woman: "I stole this car."
Officer: "Stole it?"
Older Woman: "Yes and I killed and hacked up the owner."
Officer: "You what?"
Older Woman: "His body parts are in plastic bags in the trunk if you want to see."
The Officer looks at the woman and slowly backs away to his car and calls for back-up. Within minutes 5 police cars circle the car. A senior officer slowly approaches the car, clasping his half drawn gun.
Officer 2: "Ma'am, step out of your vehicle please?"
The woman steps out of her vehicle, "Is there a problem sir?"
Officer 2: "One of my officers told me that you have stolen this car and murdered the owner."
Older Woman: "Murdered the owner?"
Officer 2: "Yes, could you please open the trunk of your car?" The woman opens the trunk, revealing nothing, but an empty trunk.
Officer 2: "Is this your car, ma'am?"
Older Woman: "Yes, here are the registration papers."
The officer is quite stunned. "One of my officers claims that you do not have a driver’s license."
The woman digs into her handbag and pulls out a clutch purse and hands it to the officer. The officer examines the license. He looks quite puzzled. "Thank you ma'am, one of my officers told me you didn't have a license, that you stole this car, and that you murdered and hacked up the owner."
Older Woman: "Bet the liar told you I was speeding, too."
Moral: Don't Mess With Old Ladies
Until you return, fill your days with GIGGLES, JOY, and APPRECIATION!
SylviaSilk, D.D. Director of the Institute For Balanced Living, Los Angeles,CA, USA
DoctorofDivinity, SpiritualCoach, ReconnectiveHealingPractitioner, Writer
Officer: "Ma'am, you were speeding."
Older Woman: "Oh, I see."
Officer: "Can I see your license please?"
Older Woman: "I'd give it to you, but I don't have one."
Officer: "Don't have one?"
Older Woman: "Lost it 4 years ago for drunk driving."
Officer: "I see. Can I see your vehicle registration papers, please?"
Older Woman: "I can't do that."
Officer: "Why not?"
Older Woman: "I stole this car."
Officer: "Stole it?"
Older Woman: "Yes and I killed and hacked up the owner."
Officer: "You what?"
Older Woman: "His body parts are in plastic bags in the trunk if you want to see."
The Officer looks at the woman and slowly backs away to his car and calls for back-up. Within minutes 5 police cars circle the car. A senior officer slowly approaches the car, clasping his half drawn gun.
Officer 2: "Ma'am, step out of your vehicle please?"
The woman steps out of her vehicle, "Is there a problem sir?"
Officer 2: "One of my officers told me that you have stolen this car and murdered the owner."
Older Woman: "Murdered the owner?"
Officer 2: "Yes, could you please open the trunk of your car?" The woman opens the trunk, revealing nothing, but an empty trunk.
Officer 2: "Is this your car, ma'am?"
Older Woman: "Yes, here are the registration papers."
The officer is quite stunned. "One of my officers claims that you do not have a driver’s license."
The woman digs into her handbag and pulls out a clutch purse and hands it to the officer. The officer examines the license. He looks quite puzzled. "Thank you ma'am, one of my officers told me you didn't have a license, that you stole this car, and that you murdered and hacked up the owner."
Older Woman: "Bet the liar told you I was speeding, too."
Moral: Don't Mess With Old Ladies
Until you return, fill your days with GIGGLES, JOY, and APPRECIATION!
SylviaSilk, D.D. Director of the Institute For Balanced Living, Los Angeles,CA, USA
DoctorofDivinity, SpiritualCoach, ReconnectiveHealingPractitioner, Writer
What a hoot! Thanks for the belly laugh, Sylvia. Lots of love, Lonni
P.S. I hope too be as wise as this woman one day!
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